There's an inverse relationship between my temper and my ability to control my accent. If you hear me say 'Fiddledeedee', run for the hills, because I'm getting ready to take out bystanders.

I think the very word stalking implies that you're not supposed to like it. Otherwise, it would be called 'fluffy harmless observation time'.

I am a disaster magnet. I came home from our first anniversary vacation with jellyfish stings, a puncture wound from a wrought iron pineapple and a cork-shaped bruise in my cleavage.

Vampires have bright eyes glistening white teeth unnaturally smooth skin and a certain animal magnetism. If they aren't pretty they starve. It's sort of like life in Los Angeles.

The brain may die, but my compulsion for useless trivia lives on.

If you want to hurt me, fine. Take my books. Burn down my house. Shave my head while I am sleeping. But nobody, nobody screws with my dog.

You can take the girl out of the library, but you can’t take the neurotic, compulsively curious librarian out of the girl.

To say I had some pent-up anger would be like saying Britney Spears had minor impulse-control issues.

You can't worry about the future so much that you miss out on the present.

Does Hallmark make a “Sorry I tried to drink your blood and touched you in a vaguely inappropriate manner” card? I settled for “How much do you remember?

Did I just get psychically pimp-slapped by a little old lady?

For success, focus on your goal, not an obstacle.

We are going to hell together. But we're coming back alive. Don't forget that.

Curse you, cheap beer. Must find miso in tiny packet.

Okay, this might sound vague, but do you know this one girl with hair like this?

Virtue is safe only when it is inspired.

It is no accident that propels people like us to Paris.

Secrets are like pregnancies hereabouts. You can hide them for a while but then they will start screaming.

The dreams now were simply of staying alive.

You can really do more than you think you can do.

I mean, technology is amoral. It has no morality.