There's no secret about success. Did you ever know a successful man who didn't tell you about it?

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

You can't always be by the people you love you have to let them live their own life.

Little, It is a small measureBut can you measure love?

We emphasize straightforwardness. You should be true to your feelings, and to your mind, expressing yourself without any reservations. This helps the listener to understand more easily.

Acceptance makes any event put on a new face.

Happiness can be just as contagious as misery.

The game in St. Louis has been halted in the fourth inning because of rain. I'll bet they have the jacuzzis going there.

I didn't train all that time just to come here and get it over with as fast as I can

I'll tell you what pressure is. Pressure is a Messerschmitt up your arse. Playing cricket is not.

When the worst student hears about the Way, he laughs out loud. If he did not laugh, it would be unworthy of being the Way.

Never find your delight in another's misfortune.