There's no such thing as writer's block. That was invented by people in California who couldn't write.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

We wish

I'm an observer. I read about life. I research life. I find a corner in a room and melt into it. I can become invisible. It's an art, and I am a wonderful practitioner.

I am no God. I am no Messiah. I am no divine incarnation. I am but a human in the service of humans.

I never knew, apes talk. Apparently, you do.

Death and love are the two wings that bear the good man to heaven.

How glorious it is - and also how painful - to be an exception.

If I felt like not saying what was on the cue card, I would. We rarely did retakes.

we love what we love and who we love who we love and why we love why we love and find a falling shoelace knotted and strung between the fingers of strangers

Women and girls should be able to determine their own future, no matter where they're born.

I am like the perfect horror movie viewer because I do not get scared very easily.