There's nothing worse than a poorly staged house.

I've given my phone number to the weirdest people. I get texts from people all the time.

I'm at the stage in my life that real-estate apps turn me on.

I was supposed to be a professional rollerblader!

The show has to be good because you want to be good. But if it's not good, it doesn't matter.

I would have liked to be a comedian in the '20s, or maybe even a comedian on the Mayflower and have a statue somewhere.

There are way too many comedians now.

When you're filming something, you have marks and spots you have to be in.

I think a lot of comedians sometimes pretend to find the job more taxing than it is.

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other.

Apostasy from Islam is a crime and is punishable by death.

If you have a good experience in a restaurant, you tell 2 people. If you have a bad experience, you tell 10 people.

People want real changes, and they understand that we have to change the system.

If you remove a treehouse from a tree, than it's just a shitty house. Sometimes when i'm in a shitty house, I like to imagine that it's in a tree, than it's like Woah, this house is amazing.

Anyone not paranoid in this world must be crazy. . . . Speaking of paranoia, it's true that I do not know exactly who my enemies are. But that of course is exactly why I'm paranoid.

The riches of the game are in the thrills, not the money.

The only law we broke was the Brezhnev doctrine that once a country is in the Soviet bloc it cannot be overthrown.

I think it's good to tell the fans "this movie's going to lead to that, and that will lead to..."

When I die, I will send down a shower of roses from the heavens,I will spend my heaven by doing good on earth.