There's things that I couldn't joke about but other people could.

Say what you want about the deaf.

The tragedy for comedians is there's nothing more they want than to be liked. We desperately seek approval. It's almost like a personality disorder you can do as a job.

My girlfriend bought a cook book the other day called 'Cheap and easy vegetarian cooking'. Which is perfect for her, because not only is she vegetarian.

British scientists have demonstrated that cigarettes can harm your children. Fair enough. Use an ashtray!

A lady with a clipboard stopped me in the street the other day. She said, 'Can you spare a few minutes for cancer research?' I said, 'All right, but we won't get much done.'

I said to my girlfriend, you shouldn't eat before you swim. She said, "why not"? I said, you look fat.

I'm not being condescending, I'm too busy thinking about far more important things you wouldn't understand.

I saw that show, 50 Things To Do Before You Die. I would have thought the obvious one was 'Shout For Help'.

If only Africa had more mosquito nets then every year we could save millions of mosquitoes from dying needlessly of aids.

People with Tourettes.....What makes them tick?

Hillary Clinton failed on the economy, just like she's failed on foreign policy. Everything she touched didn't work out. Nothing.

Always do what you're afraid to do. ... I will prove myself strong when they think I am sick. I will prove myself brave when they think I am weak.

The great thing, as a screenwriter, is that you are always proud of what ends up on the screen, you are able to create something in isolation and you have a lot of freedom.

When I set a goal, I work hard to achieve it.

There's not enough good things in the world.

A bitter drug oft brings relief.

You are also the physician who must watch over yourself. But in the course of every illness there are many days in which the physician can do nothing but wait.

He asked himself those some questions too many times and felt the fears again that kept him where he was

I define power as control over one's life. Pay is not about power. Pay is about giving up power to get the power of pay.

This is what it's all about. From what I could see, you could get a bunch of people together, whip up the press and have some impact.