There seems to be no lengths to which humorless people will not go to analyze humor. It seems to worry them.

We call ourselves a free nation, and yet we let ourselves be told what cabs we can and can't take by a man at a hotel door, simply because he has a drum major's uniform on.

Why don't you get out of that wet coat and into a dry martini?

The free-lance writer is a man who is paid per piece or per word or perhaps.

You might think that after thousands of years of coming up too soon and getting frozen, the crocus family would have had a little sense knocked into it.

Anyone can do any amount of work, provided it isn't the work he is supposed be doing at that moment.

In America there are two classes of travel - first class, and with children.

Defining and analyzing humor is a pastime of humorless people.

A boy can learn a lot from a dog: obedience, loyalty, and the importance of turning around three times before lying down.

Dachshunds are ideal dogs for small children, as they are already stretched and pulled to such a length that the child cannot do much harm one way or the other.

There is no such place as Budapest. Perhaps you are thinking of Bucharest, and there is no such place as Bucharest, either.

Dreams, desires, destiny, and difficulties in life make it a magical and meaningful fairytale.

Just you wait till I’m a vampire! I’m not going to be sitting on the sidelines next time.

Every man for himself.

We can always take but never give.

Fan the sinking flame of hilarity with the wing of friendship; and pass the rosy wine.

While the work or play is on, it is a lot of fun if while you are doing one you don't constantly feel that you ought to be doing the other.

When you look into an abyss, the abyss also looks into you.

Rama, Allah and God are to me convertible terms.

Oh you two look delicious," Bast said, licking her lips. "No, no-er, I mean wonderful. Now, off you go!

I find that I have no problem getting a table at a restaurant when I walk in.