These ballot initiatives remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so long as that dream doesn't make Midwesterners feel icky!

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

In your imagination, nothing is impossible

Such a little childTo send to be a priestling...Icy poverty

Don't believe everything you read on the Internet.

The brighter the sunlight, the worse it affects them, " said Einstein."So we got to pay more attention to the weather forecast, " said DogNut. "Cloudy with a chance of zombies.

Dont you know... I'm the boggyman."-St. Dane

I guess you wouldn't dare to dream that you would get to the end of five years.

What counts in a good story is the person inside. Keep it simple.

There is purpose in pain; otherwise it were devilish.

The question is not do you take money out of stocks and put it into real estate, or the reverse. There's so much money out there looking for a home. I don't think it's either/or.

Successful visionaries start from where they are, what they have, and what their customers have.