They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days.

Welcome to Lake Wobegon, where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking, and all the children are above average.

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car.

It was luxuries like air conditioning that brought down the Roman Empire. With air conditioning their windows were shut, they couldn't hear the barbarians coming.

Even in a time of elephantine vanity and greed, one never has to look far to see the campfires of gentle people.

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together.

Thank you, God, for this good life and forgive us if we do not love it enough.

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose.

Be well, do good work, and keep in touch.

Sometimes there is nothing you can do, and in those times, you must do something anyway.

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. ~Garrison Keillor

what is love? love is you!

Innovation is the result of a process that brings radical ideas to create positive change

Mae West had it right—try anything once, do it again if you like it.

Sincerity: if you can fake it, you've got it made.

Tea-making is a ritual that, like the drink itself, warms the heart somehow.

I enjoy cooking and baking. Alicia Silverstone's vegan cookbook is awesome.

Formulae are the anaesthetics of thought, not its stimulants and to make any one think is far better worth while than cramming him with ill-considered, and therefore indigestible, learning.

I was amazed to receive later a substantial sum for sitting in my room and talking about myself. If only I could get some of the back pay!

Maybe lifting someone else’s weight makes yours a little more bearable

The spirit of this country is totally adverse to a large military force.