They say that time is relative. I think the way it's treating me it's a distant one, maybe a bad uncle, and not welcome in my house this Christmas!!

Remember never to text and drive, it's bad grammar, even if you have a deadline. You might cross the line and dead may be your destination. Think about it!!

Thought about being a stand up comedienne for zombies, but when they eat you alive, they really eat you!!

Years ago there was an old man I knew that told me he didn't trust me, because people with beards were hiding from something. I told him, "That's true, I'm hiding from the barber!!

Just out of sight around a bend in the river there's always a small island full of magic and mystery just waiting for you.

I don't know why they call them Cheerios, I ate an entire box and didn't feel any happier!!

I sprayed my dog with off and he still sits in my favorite chair!!

I have my moments, I just can't remember where I put them.

Turn your diodes this way and pulse...

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush, unless it is the burning bush, in that case the value of your bird just went up!!

If a book falls in the woods and nobody read it, was it ever written?

When your freedom depends on the death of an innocent, it haunts you forever, ' Red thought empathetically. 'Even if you couldn’t save them anyway.

He'd possessed all the key elements of a school shooter: hormones, misery, ammunition. People wondered how something like Columbine could happen. Jude wondered why it didn't happen more often.

I'm going to fight for every citizen of every background from every stretch of America.

A survey says that American workers work the first three hours every day just to pay their taxes. So that's why we can't get anything done in the morning: We're government workers.

I hope there's some kind of morality in all my work.

At the heart, it is world music that I do. It's all connections. Ultimately, we're all connected.

I definitely don't want to do drama. I'm not looking to branch out into that world.

How can you consider flower power outdated? The essence of my lyrics is the desire for peace and harmony. That's all anyone has ever wanted. How could it become outdated?

If you stare at an object, as you do when you paint, there is no point at which you stop learning things from it.

Armenag Saroyan was the failed poet, the failed Presbyterian preacher, the failed American, the failed theological student.