They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn't always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

The Big Cactus... because if you come too close, you're gonna get stuck.

I knew I was dog meat. Luckily, I'm the high-priced dog meat that everybody wants. I'm the good-quality dog meat. I'm the Alpo of the NBA.

The stats win nothing. I'm still sexy. I'm still great.

You know, I'm very photogenic.

No one calls me out, I'm from LSU.

I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet.

I'm not going to try to go out there and outdo him. I don't have to try to outdo him, I'm Shaq.

This summer is going to be a different summer for a lot of people. Everyone is going to take care of their own business and everyone is going to do what's best for them, including me.

I'm going back to the old Shaq. I was normal last year - I was an earthling last summer. I had to go back to my alien roots.

I'm dominant every night. I come in every night and get beat up. I never make a face when they try to flagrant or hack-a-Shaq me, because I'm not from this planet. Earthlings don't faze me.

Fate loves the fearless.

Only God may be adored, because only God is unlimited goodness, truth, and beauty, and thus only God deserves unlimited love.

The one thing that I know is that you win with good people.

Time is but a thought, a means of measurement, not a reality.

My own parents were touchy-feely.

Records must not be the focus and that's the most important thing. It mustn't come at the cost of the team.

i know i'm not clever but i'm always right.

Mine eyes have seen the glory of the coming of the Lord: / He is trampling out the vintage where the grapes of wrath are stored.

In the glare of your mind, be modest. And beholden to what is tactile, and thrilling.

Never do your enemy a minor injury.