This music won't do. There's not enough sarcasm in it.

When someone does something good, applaud! You will make two people happy.

If I could drop dead right now, I'd be the happiest man alive.

We want a story that starts out with an earthquake and works its way up to a climax.

I don't want any yes-men around me. I want everybody to tell me the truth even if it costs them their job.

The harder I work, the luckier I get.

A hospital is no place to be sick.

Ninety percent of the art of living consists of getting along with people you cannot stand.

I'm willing to admit that I may not always be right, but I am never wrong.

From success you get a lot of things, but not that great inside thing that love brings you.

If Roosevelt were alive today, he'd turn over in his grave.

In jealousy there is more of self-love than love

The farther reason looks the greater is the haze in which it loses itself.

We've already seen, in practically every country around the world where these issues have been covered, that the general public has recoiled at the ideology behind these programs.

We lay aside letters never to read them again, and at last we destroy them out discretion, and so disappears the most immediate breath of life, irrecoverably for ourselves and for others.

Grace imitates modesty, as politeness imitates kindness.

Fur pillows are hard to actually sleep on.

Intellect has to surrender to instinct when it is time to play.

The most important dreams occur while people are fully awake.

Isn't it interesting that we place deadbolt locks on our doors to keep evil influences out and then allow and even invite evil influences into our home through television.