This policeman came up to me with a pencil and a piece of very thin paper. He said, "I want you to trace someone for me."

Velcro: what a rip-off.

Black beauty - he's a dark horse.

I saw this bloke chatting up a cheetah. He was trying to pull a fast one.

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox.

Ive decided to sell my Hoover… well, it was just collecting dust.

I went out on a date with Simile. I don't know what I metaphor.

I was reading a book... 'the history of glue' - I couldn't put it down.

Crime in multi-storey car parks. That is wrong on so many different levels.

So I said to the gym instructor: 'Can you teach me to do the splits?' He said: 'How flexible are you?' I said: I can't make Tuesdays.'

So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red.

The great tragedy of life is not that men perish, but that they cease to love.

In the physical ascension one sees the signs upon the horizons

Between the desireAnd the spasm, Between the potencyAnd the existence, Between the essenceAnd the descent, Falls the Shadow.

I sometimes fall into the trap of doing what I think I should be doing rather than what I want to be doing.

Time is a device to stop everything from happening at once ... space is a device to stop everything from happening in Cambridge.

You can be a boy, a girl, whatever you want. I have a lot of man in me.

Truth, in the broadest sense, means being attuned with the real. To be authentically in touch with the true, and the good and the beautiful. Yes?

It is time for every one of us to roll up our sleeves and put ourselves at the top of our commitment list.

Luck is when determination meets opportunity

No one can stop what God has for you.