[To a group of women prisoners:] You're luckier than I am. You're wanted and I'm not.

Real education should educate us out of self into something far finer; into a selflessness which links us with all humanity.

The only thing I like about rich people is their money.

I married beneath me. All women do.

One reason I don't drink is that I want to know when I am having a good time.

Women have got to make the world safe for men, since men have made it so darned unsafe for women.

[After her election to the British Parliament and being welcomed to 'the most exclusive men's club in Europe':] It won't be exclusive long. When I came in, I left the door wide open!

The most practical thing in the world is common sense and common humanity.

In passing, also, I would like to say that the first time Adam had a chance he laid the blame on a woman.

The penalty for success is to be bored by the people who used to snub you.

Sir, if you were my husband, I would poison your drink.

The imagination is always more horrible than the truth.

The good thing about flying solo is it's never boring.

Life is composed of different inventions. I have continued to work at different things and rebuilt my home all by myself. I did it for the sake of satisfaction at doing something.

A society deadened by a smothering network of laws while finding release in moral chaos is not likely to be either happy or stable.

Success only breeds a new goal

My dream in life is to write the one gag that makes everyone in the world laugh.

You don't begin to live, until you've lost everything.

For the moment, he's off plotting his Igoresque revenge. I don't know about you, but I have this image of him rubbing his hands together and laughing like Dexter from Dexter's Laboratory. (Kyrian)

I learned the songs and played the gigs, and then they called me about a month later. They told me they were like super stoked on me and asked me to join their band.

Talent is a valued tormentor.