To call New York's traffic at holiday time a nightmare is to understate.

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?

If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you.

As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.

Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.

It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

I don't see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty - and evaporating quickly.

I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you're hungry for power.

I don't feel old. I feel like a young man that has something wrong with him.

Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.

My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.

I’ve never had anyone’s approval, so I’ve learned to live without it.

By keeping my hand in that, it's the way I keep learning. The main way you learn in medicine is by practicing and working with patients.

I think there's a lot of evolution that's happened in intangible ways, in terms of how I think about the work or how I plan it out.

Believing in fate produces fate. Believing in freedom will create infinite possibilities.

Certainly my parents were Dr. [Benjamin] Spock-driven parents. So they were tolerant.

Intelligence is something we are born with. Thinking is a skill that must be learned.

I'd hope to reach any kid who feels apart from the group - those who seem to be outsiders, who feel different. Kids who want to reach their parents often don't know how to do so.

Porkchops and bacon, my two favorite animals.

The border between editing and ghostwriting is, at its extremes, a bit porous. An editor really improves and sometimes restructures a manuscript and suggests changes.