To this day I don’t know if he was struggling with the moral implications of gunning down half a dozen civilians, or if he was mentally counting to see if he had that many shells left in the gun.

Something coming back from the dead was almost always bad news. Movies taught me that. For every one Jesus you get a million zombies.

Son, the greatest trick the Devil pulled was convincing the world there was only one of him.

When a man plans, a woman laughs.

Welcome to freakdom, Dave. It’ll be time to start a Web site soon, where you’ll type out everything in one huge paragraph.

Here’s exclusive Channel 5 video of a local man having his brain eaten by a winged gremlin. Local gremlin experts warn that—

... life is a flickering candle we all carry around. A gust of wind, a meaningless accident, a microsecond of carelessness, and it's out. Forever.

You see, time is an ocean, not a garden hose. Space is a puff of smoke, a wisp of cloud.

My melon soulCrushed by your Gallagher of apathy

I'm scared David""That's good, because there's lots to be afraid of

I tried to say something cool, wound up stammering something like, “WANNA YOU WANNA WEENIE ME?” The end kind of trailed off in a shrill, choking warble.

Faith is not about finding meaning in the world, there may be no such thing -- faith is the belief in our capacity to create meaningful lives.

(...)best of luck, avoid roasted cabbage, don't eat earwax, and look on the bright side of life!

Even innocent Adam is liker to forget God in a paradise, than Joseph in a prison, or Job upon a dunghill(376)[.]

I've never wanted to leave. I'm here for the rest of my life, and hopefully after that as well.

I know the Lord is anxious to respond to us if we will only turn to him.

All my life, I just felt that I should have finished my education.

I've never suffered from writer's block. I have plenty of ideas, sometimes too many. I've always had a strong imagination. If it dries up I'll stop and look for another career.

Acting advice is a bit like your parents teaching you how to drive a car. You know they're right, but you still kind of want them to shut up a bit.

My advice to you, if you should ever be in a hold up, is to line up with the cowards and save your bravery for an occasion when it may be of some benefit to you.

I feel uncomfortable because I'm insecure about who I am.