Today, at Harvard, any student with the currently fashionable color of skin is given rights denied to students of the currently unfashionable color.

Like all New York hotel lady cashiers she had red hair and had been disappointed in her first husband.

Abstract art: a product of the untalented sold by the unprincipled to the utterly bewildered.

There are certain books in the world which every searcher for truth must know: the Bible, the Critique of Pure Reason, the Origin of Species, and Karl Marx's Capital.

Any place that anyone can learn something useful from someone with experience is an educational institution.

Success is following the pattern of life one enjoys most.

The secret of how to live without resentment or embarrassment in a world in which I was different from everyone else. was to be indifferent to that difference.

The public is like a piano. You just have to know what keys to poke.

Anyone who can walk to the welfare office can walk to work.

My work is being destroyed almost as soon as it is printed. One day it is being read; the next day someone's wrapping fish in it.

Young people should be helped, sheltered, ignored, and clubbed of necessary.

If God creates morality, then morality is nothing more than the whimsy of a divine being blindly followed by humans.

That which God writes on thy forehead thou wilt come to it.

I wish I knew the good of wishing.

Men always do leave off really thinking, when the last bit of wild animal dies in them.

A man who is certain he is right is almost sure to be wrong.

Remember, Jesus says: Those who are the last here will be the first in my kingdom of God.

What is it about business that makes us laugh - when things go wrong, which they do all the time (why, I still wish I knew) then we need to laugh.

Extreme remedies are never the first to be resorted to.

In high school, I used to think it was "like sooooo cool" if a guy had an awesome car. Now none of that matters. These days I look for character and honesty and trust.

The 21st century will not be about the battle between capitalism and socialism but between the forces of progress and the forces of conservatism.