Today is February 14th - St. Valentine's day. Women call it Love day, while men name it as Extortion day.

According to a new survey, 90% of men say their lover is also their best friend. Which is really kind of disturbing when you consider man's best friend is his dog.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

The Supreme Court has ruled that they cannot have a nativity scene in Washington, D.C. This wasn't for any religious reasons. They couldn't find three wise men and a virgin.

Today is Valentine's Day - or, as men like to call it, Extortion Day!

You can't stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh.

Politics is just show business for ugly people.

CNN found that Hillary Clinton is the most admired woman in America. Women admire her because she's strong and successful. Men admire her because she allows her husband to cheat and get away with it.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?'

Bush reiterated his stand to conservatives opposing his decision on stem cell research. He said today he believes life begins at conception and ends at execution.

Magic Johnson, former basketball player, may run for mayor of L.A. in the next election. Remember the good 'ol days when only qualified people ran for office like actors and professional wrestlers.

People are shaped by their emotions. That which profoundly affects them has a place in their hearts.

I gave them everything I had, and I guess it feelsalright.I gave them my body, and they use it every night.

The ego of a god, the wit of a goldfish.

Men are made for happiness and anyone who is completely happy has a right to say to himself: "I am doing God's will on earth."

Your Honour, unless your Honour, without a moment's loss of time, makes sail for the nearest shore, this is a doomed ship, and her name is the Coffin!

Arafat's departure has created an awesome opportunity.

That's insanity. We must be good all the time.

One who leans on others cannot serve the God of Truth.

To love is to admire with the heart; to admire is to love with the mind.

There are people in the world who 1,000% will love you just the way you are. So no matter what, keep that in mind.