Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

Zoology, eh? That's a big word, isn't it." "No, actually it isn't," said Tiffany. "Patronizing is a big word. Zoology is really quite short.

You can change a body, but you can't change a soul. The heart wants what it wants.

Reading, my earliest refuge in the unknown world, made me want to venture into it.

Americans just don’t realize the viciousness of the militant Islamic fundamentalist.

What a person thinks on his own without being stimulated by the thoughts and experiences of the other people is even in the best case rather paltry and monotonous.

I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world.

Music is a male-dominated field. Women are not always taken as seriously as we should be, so sometimes we have to put our foot down.

When a dog is chasing after you, whistle for him.

Like the sun and moon, they end but to begin anew; like the four seasons, they pass away to return once more.

Fishing is a pleasure of retirement, yet the angler has the power to let the fish live or die.