Unsuccessful candidates for the Presidency should be quietly hanged as a matter of public sanitation and decorum.

Love is like war: easy to begin but very hard to stop.

On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.

The demagogue is one who preaches doctrines he knows to be untrue to men he knows to be idiots.

The whole aim of practical politics is to keep the populace alarmed (and hence clamorous to be led to safety) by menacing it with an endless series of hobgoblins, all of them imaginary.

Morality is doing what is right, no matter what you are told. Religion is doing what you are told, no matter what is right.

Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats.

Democracy is a pathetic belief in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.

It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.

Democracy is also a form of worship. It is the worship of Jackals by Jackasses.

Our goal should be not to redefine masculinity, but to abolish it.

Jez had gone from an evil twin to a sweet, even angelic, girl, all in less than a minute.

LIFE IS NEVER OVER.

There are some people that you cannot change you must either swallow them whole or leave them alone.

All that's different about me is that I still ask the questions most people stopped asking at age five.

In the theater, you act more of the time. In the movies, you get to act maybe 20 or 30 minutes of the day. I love acting in movies. It's just different.

Write because you love the art and the discipline, not because you're looking to sell something.

When a photographer masters the tools and processes of the art, then the quality of the work is only limited by his creative vision.

The subject matter is so much more important than the photographer.

Know that there's enough room for everyone to be passionate, creative & successful. In fact, there's more than room for everyone; there is a need for everyone.