Usually I'm right, by the way - so never mind all the other.

I don't need anyone to rectify my existence. The most profound relationship we will ever have is the one with ourselves.

I think of life itself now as a wonderful play that I've written for myself, and so my purpose is to have the utmost fun playing my part.

And I think we'll be able to prove scientifically that other talents such as intuitive, psychic, clairvoyant and audiovoyant are very real.

It's useless to hold a person to anything he says while he's in love, drunk, or running for office.

You know when you eat too many sweets and get diabetes? Paparazzi are the diabetes of materialistic culture.

Fear makes strangers of people who would be friends.

Dwelling on the negative simply contributes to its power.

We are not victims of the world we see, we are victims of the way we see the world.

A person who knows how to laugh at himself will never ceased to be amused.

Crystals amplify the consciousness.

Everybody has to die. Why cry, when you have wings to fly!

Lean brands are the result of continually testing assumptions.

It turns out that I learned something from my dear old dad after all: firemen are experts at getting into places they shouldn't be.

So, one way or another, I found myself in a few movies. I take it seriously when I'm on the set, but I don't take myself seriously as an actor.

One of my favorite people I got to meet was my childhood idol, Vincent Price. I got to not only meet him, but become friendly with him before he passed away.

Yeah, Dizzee Rascal is a huge influence on what I'm doing. I learnt a lot from him even though he's younger than me.

I publish my own books, so there isn't a certain editor I owe the book to at a publishing house.

To justify and extol human greed and egotism is to my mind not only immoral, but evil.

The only bookstore I had was the paperback rack at the drugstore.

Now, I think the people who are still doing stand-up are doing it because they love stand-up.