Usually I'm too tired to apologize.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

Sometimes, you feel like being watched from behind by someone.When you turned, it's just nothing, nobody, none, or only someone who's daydreaming and staring right through you.

Though you should still let her do what she wants, don't let her take total control of you or you won't be making the most of your experience.

Procrastination is one of the most common and deadliest of diseases and its toll on success and happiness is heavy.

Death, which we are accustomed to consider an evil, really acts for us the friendliest part, and takes away the commonplace of existence.

Warriorship does not refer to making war on others. Aggression is the source of our problems, not the solution. Warriorship is the tradition of human bravery, or the tradition of fearlessness.

I'm very bad with improvisation. I hate it.

Nothing is impossible when we follow our inner guidance, even when its direction may threaten us by reversing our usual logic.

When I hear Donald Trump say, "Make America great again", I wonder when he thought America ever was great." He has been criticizing our country for decades. He even criticized Ronald Reagan.

If you have a dream, you can achieve that dream, you can achieve that goal. You just gotta go for it. But it also lets you know, that there is a price to pay.

The little words in the Republic of Letters, like the little folks in a nation, are the most useful and significant.