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Demetri Martin Quotes: Vampires probably don't have great breath.
         

Vampires probably don't have great breath.


Demetri Martin
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Other quotes of Demetri Martin


I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.



How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.



I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.



The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.



A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.



Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.



The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.



The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.



A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.



When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.





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Nobody's innocent... but that doesn't reset the bar on guilt.

Nobody's innocent... but that doesn't reset the bar on guilt.



I see dull people as projects ... to be reformed

I see dull people as projects ... to be reformed



She'll kill me if she finds you in here. Can you climb trees? Tell me you can climb a tree!"Patch grinned, "I can fly.

She'll kill me if she finds you in here. Can you climb trees? Tell me you can climb a tree!"Patch grinned, "I can fly.



In my view, the best gift is one that benefits both the receiver and the planet.

In my view, the best gift is one that benefits both the receiver and the planet.



When I sang the line, 'Songs about Old Ireland.Songs about being young again.I wish I was young again,' twice people cried. I saw them.

When I sang the line, 'Songs about Old Ireland.Songs about being young again.I wish I was young again,' twice people cried. I saw them.



If you haven't read Alan Fletcher's The Art of Looking Sideways you should be arrested for calling yourself a Designer

If you haven't read Alan Fletcher's The Art of Looking Sideways you should be arrested for calling yourself a Designer



I'd rather hug Magic Johnson after he rolled around in barbed wire.

I'd rather hug Magic Johnson after he rolled around in barbed wire.



I don't know how people live without coffee, I really don't.

I don't know how people live without coffee, I really don't.



Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.

Concern yourself not with what you tried and failed in, but with what it is still possible for you to do.



I've had such an odd career.

I've had such an odd career.




Quote Description


This page presents the quote "Vampires probably don't have great breath.". Author of this quote is Demetri Martin. This quote is about vampire, breaths,.