Violence doesn't solve anything? World War I. World War II. Star Wars. Every Super Bowl. Who says violence doesn't solve anything?

When I did Comic Relief, I did it to be on the show; it's a badge of honor as a comedian to do that show.

Even when people are rich and successful on TV shows, there's always some trouble - you have to poke holes in them, throw them out of a job, put a pie in the face.

Learn how to set goals. That's the key to everything. That includes designing your own success. You define what the goal is, it's not somebody else's goal, it's yours.

Oh, you hate your job? Why didn't you say so? There's a support group for that. It's called everybody, and they meet at the bar.

I'm a big believer in overcoming and achieving and doing things and not feeling sorry for yourself.

I love the normalcy of Cleveland. There's regular people there.

There's no way I can justify my salary level, but I'm learning to live with it.

You say tomato, I say bourbon and coke.

Things don't make me nearly as happy as talking and having a beer with my friends. And that's something everyone can do.

Liquor prohibition led to the rise of organized crime in America, and drug prohibition has led to the rise of the gang problems we have now.

But something happened when I got out into the world, something that changed me. It was the reconnection of being at one with yourself and with this world.

His heart expanded until he was nothing but a heart. A giant pounding heart on two shaking legs walking over to her.

Wealthy people attract critics like wealthy ships attract pirates.

If I had my way...We would lock ourselves away from that madness out there.

Hopefully I'll be the first Mexican-American going into Hillbilly Heaven.

Lawyers sometimes tell the truth. They'll do anything to win a case.

Looking good Matt, you look like a money.

That's when you really lose people, you know.When the pain passes.

Excellence" is not a gift, but a skill that takes practice. We do not act "rightly" because we are "excellent", in fact we achieve "excellence" by acting "rightly".

My star was kind of fading towards the end of the '60s and suddenly I got this call from Fellini, who just appeared to kind of love me!