Walking in high heels should be made an Olympic sport.

What do women want? Shoes.

What becomes of the broken-hearted? They buy shoes.

Planning your own coming-of-age experience may wither you prematurely, but just think of it this way: If you can get through this, childbirth should be a breeze.

Of all the wonderful things that men and women share, shoes, tragically, are not one of them. This is because men lack the shoe chromosome.

Remember when you were eleven years old and you thought how great it would be to get your period? And then you got it? That's what planning a wedding is like.

Even if you're fat, one thing always fits: shoes.

... the running shoe ... could be called the Swiss Army knife of footwear ... What appeal is there to a shoe whose only selling point is comfort?

In LA, it's the law that you must be engaged in writing a screenplay with your hairdresser, pool boy, personal trainer, life coach, dog walker, or yoga instructor.

Your wedding will not be what you think it is going to be, no matter what you think it is going to be.

I wasn’t invited to be on staff at the Simpsons because they didn’t want any women on staff at the time.

Never measure the height of a mountain until you have reached the top. Then you will see how low it was.

I am a weak and sinful man, but God put His hands on me, that is all.

Meet people from other cultures, so you understand that the world doesn't swirl around you.

Prana is more powerful than just about anything - food, exercise, skin creams, and Spanx.

Use your eyes as if tomorrow you would become blind.

He's an old good fighter, he's an intelligent fighter but I wouldn't say he's the best I've ever fought.

Our ordinary language has no means for describing a particular shade of color. Thus it is incapable of producing a picture of this color.

Instead of war on poverty, they got a war on drugs so the police can bother me.

One of the biggest hurdles in the path of entrepreneurship is home loans!