Was the period of happiness worth the unhappiness that followed a breakup? Most people seemed to think so, because they got on the love train time and time again.

If you're looking for Mr. Perfect, you‟re going to spend your whole life being disappointed, because he doesn‟t exist. You have to get the best deal you can, but there will always be problems.

I have a real low tolerance for parasites, and you're so close to the limit that I'm already reaching for the flea powder.

A village somewhere was missing it's idiot.

Sign by elevator put up by computer geeks in office building: REMEMBER: FIRST YOU PILAGE, THEN YOU BURN. THOSE WHO DO NOT COMPLY WILL BE SUSPENDED FROM THE RAIDING TEAM. In Mr Perfect

Women were always complications, bless their perverse little hearts.

Pleasure was a siren, luring her to experience more

I'm not holding you against your will; I'm holding you against your car.

If death turned out to be a lack of being rather than a lack of consciousness, well, then, that sucked.

Don’t kiss me,” she said warningly. “I don’t intend to,” he replied, smiling a little. “I don’t have my whip and chair with me.

He needed a woman. Bad.

I just want to die knowing that I’ve made a difference in the world... or at least a difference to someone, no matter how small the difference.

He disliked emotion not because he felt lightly but because he felt deeply.

If it were better, it wouldn't be as good.

I don't want to send them to jail. I want to send them to school.

That dark humor has always been a part of what I've done. It's always been somewhat tongue-in-cheek.

The only thing that can spoil a day is people and if you can keep from making engagements, every day has no limits.

Misogynist: A man who hates women as much as women hate one another.

My characters aren't losers. They're rebels. They win by their refusal to play by everyone else's rules.

Our energies are often stimulated by the necessity of supporting a being weaker than ourselves.

Next to an old-fashioned church social, or possibly a monster bridge party, there is no buzz which can equal the sibilant buzz ofa matinée.