We are going to be raising a generation of mentally impaired people.

You can truly grieve for every officer who's been lost in the line of duty in this country, and still be troubled by cases of police overreach.

I celebrated Thanksgiving in an old-fashioned way. I invited everyone in my neighborhood to my house, we had an enormous feast, and then I killed them and took their land.

There are a hell of a lot of jobs that are scarier than live comedy. Like standing in the operating room when a guy's heart stops, and you're the one who has to fix it!

We have it. The smoking gun. The evidence. The potential weapon of mass destruction we have been looking for as our pretext of invading Iraq. There's just one problem - it's in North Korea.

Religion. It's given people hope in a world torn apart by religion.

I've always liked Atlanta. And not just for the strip clubs, but the shopping and the food.

Yes, reason has been a part of organized religion, ever since two nudists took dietary advice from a talking snake.

I really like to put my name on everything, so my roommate doesn't steal it. It's really a throwback to that.

I'm too short to host a late-night talk show. It's like the bar at an amusement-park ride. You have to be six foot two or over.

If your regime is not strong enough to handle a joke, then you don't have a regime.

My Lord, my God here are my words

You need to return to the truth of God's Word that will last forever, not meditate on circumstance that will fade and change. It is this truth that enables us to go into the future undaunted.

God hates violence. He has ordained that all men fairly possess their property, not seize it.

A person who hasn't grieved a significant loss has unfinished business inside and can cause others great grief as a result.

Adults always acted like they could fix everything. But they can't. And they know it.

From a distance it is something; and nearby it is nothing.

If you can but give to the fainting soul at your door a cup of water from the wells of truth, it shall flash back on you the radiance of God. As you save, so shall you be saved.

[Donald] Trump is fascism, that's all, so we have to find a way to work it out between Hillary [Clinton] and Bernie [Sanders].

Our rash faults Make trivial price of serious thing we have, Not knowing them until we know their grave.

Can one serve God and one's nation in parliament?