We have 51 golf courses in Palm Springs. He [President Ford] never decides which course he will play until after the first tee shot.

A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it.

A sense of humor is good for you. Have you ever heard of a laughing hyena with heart burn?

No one party can fool all of the people all of the time; that's why we have two parties

I always like to go to Washington D.C. It gives me a chance to visit my money.

My idea of Christmas, whether old-fashioned or modern, is very simple: loving others. Come to think of it, why do we have to wait for Christmas to do that?

I have seen what a laugh can do. It can transform almost unbearable tears into something bearable, even hopeful.

When she started to play, Steinway came down personally and rubbed his name off the piano.

The good news is that Jesus is coming back. The bad news is that he's really pissed off.

The trees in Siberia are miles apart, that is why the dogs are so fast.

I don't do a lot of political jokes. Too many are getting elected.

Surrender to fate and you will never be fully contented.

I have always waited for the perfect tools to carve a statue, little did I realize that tools were never the issue, It's my carving skills which needed an upgrade and improvement.

The unleashed power of the atom has changed everything save our modes of thinking and we thus drift toward unparalleled catastrophe.

England is my wife, America my mistress. It is very good sometimes to get away from one's wife.

I also think the relationship I have with my audience is a lot more complex than what Hitchcock seemed to want his to be - although I think he had more going on under the surface as well.

A sufficient realization of love will dissolve it all. If only you could love enough you would be the happiest and most powerful being in the world.

When you find the one, my lad, grab her up in your arms and never let her go. You may never get another chance.

I believe in the value of the book, which keeps something irreplaceable, and in the necessity of fighting to secure its respect.

Super blessed & excited to be part of the Nickelodeon family! It's amazing to be on a network I grew up watching!

It's okay to feel weak sometimes. It's okay to be afraid. The important thing is that we face our fears. That's...that's what makes us strong.