We know who the homicidal maniacs are. They are the ones cheering and dancing right now.

Four years of Jimmy Carter gave us two titanic Reagan landslides, peace and prosperity for eight blessed years - and even a third term for his feckless vice president, George H.W. Bush.

I'm getting a little fed up with hearing about, oh, civilian casualties. I think we ought to nuke North Korea right now just to give the rest of the world a warning.

Usually the nonsense liberals spout is kind of cute, but in wartime their instinctive idiocy is life-threatening.

I highly approve of Romney's decision to be kind and gentle to the retard.

We need somebody to put rat poisoning in Justice Stevens' creme brulee. That's just a joke, for you in the media.

Any growing interest in soccer can only be a sign of the nation's moral decay.

I might be in favor of national healthcare if it required all Democrats to get their heads examined.

In the druidical religion of liberalism, not separating your recyclables is a sin, but abortion is just a medical procedure.

There is no surer proof of Christ's divinity than that he is still so hated some two thousand years after his death.

Liberals want the family destroyed, they want religion destroned, because then you have loyalty directly to the state.

If it's very painful for you to criticize your friends - you're safe in doing it. But if you take the slightest pleasure in it, that's the time to hold your tongue.

In all my life and in the future, I will always be a faithful and loyal servant to all of my compatriots.

Marble, I perceive, covers a multitude of sins.

Deep within the heart of every evangelist lies the wreck of a car salesman.

I know I'm honest and dependable, usually. I know I'm always dependable for my wife. I'm always at home and I'm always there to help.

I want to sing like Aretha Franklin. Before her I wanted the technical ability of Ella Fitzgerald.

It is clearly absurd that it should be possible for a woman to qualify as a saint with direct access to the Almighty, while she may not qualify as a curate.

Chose the niche that you enjoy, where you can excel and stand a chance of becoming and acknowledged leader.

I don't want to be known as a jerk forever.

So what I'd really like is to try and conceal him somewhere safe, then go hunt, and come back and collect him. But I have a feeling his ego isn't going to go for that suggestion.