We look on those approaching the banks of a river all must cross, with ten times the interest they excited when dancing in the meadow.

A physician can sometimes parry the scythe of death, but has no power over the sand in the hourglass.

I think character never changes; the Acorn becomes an Oak, which is very little like an Acorn to be sure, but it never becomes an Ash.

Friendship is far more delicate than love.

Tis never for their wisdom that one loves the wisest...

'Tis never for their wisdom that one loves the wisest, or for their wit that one loves the wittiest; 'tis for benevolence, and virtue, and honest fondness, one loves people...

Women bear Crosses better than Men do, but bear Surprizes - worse.

Nothing is so fatiguing as the life of a wit.

[Samuel] Johnson's conversation was by much too strong for a person accustomed to obsequiousness and flattery; it was mustard in a young child's mouth!

I am perpetually bringing or losing babies, both very dreadful operations to me, and which tear mind and body both in pieces very cruelly.

If truth can be found in any sublunary science, numbers will produce it, for to that at last almost all other sciences refer for confirmation.

No one is actually dead until the ripples they cause in the world die away...

I see the beauty of books and sacred-souls of every author displaced in a bookshop.

Follow your heart

Comedy is very difficult. I love it because when you do it right, its the best feeling in the world.

I never rode a motorcycle before CHiPs.

Will you still love me when I'm a monster?

It's funny how it usually works out that I end up dying. It sort of works out, because by the time I die, I'm usually tired of working on that particular movie, so I look forward to it.

The more successful I get, the more I am reminded that in the minds of a great many people I will never be anything more than my body. No matter what I accomplish, I will be fat, first and foremost.

I once said that CGI makes you less inventive. At the time I was bemoaning the loss of the practical stunt. If a stunt can be done practically and safely, I'd rather do it old-style.

I think that no matter how much you don't like yourself or the drama of your life you can still find some comedy in it.