We must cooperate to turn this country around

By worrying about the future, We will convolute our present lives.

No human being really has any misery. It is your own mistake if you complain of the misery.

You have to understand how bad I wanted to be a comedian, how much I loved doing it. I still can't believe I get to do this for a living and have people come up and want to see me.

I would read Playboy more often, but my glasses keep steaming up.

Women can't travel light. We're in charge of the basic facts.

I hated the whole idea of being an actress. I used to throw up before every performance and cry afterward.

Everyone knows about the substantive issues of concern, like federal health care, but very little is said about the process, the lack of accountability.

If teachers and grammar school editors find my jawbreaker sentences shatter their mushmilk teeth, let them eat stale cake dunked in weak tea of their own ungodly manufacture.

In conlusion, there is no conclusion. Things will go on as they always have, getting weirder all the time.

I prayed, thanking God, for making it all possible for me, because I knew where I came from.