We realize we can't have everything, and so begins the mad dash to have everything else.

Enjoy the little things, for one day you may look back and realize they were the big things.

Cherish the friend who tells you a harsh truth, wanting ten times more to tell you a loving lie.

You can spend too much time wondering which of identical twins is the more alike.

What greater blessing to give thanks for at a family gathering than the family and the gathering.

Ever wonder what crime you committed that you are confined to a small enclosure above your sinuses, under permanent skull arrest?

If minutes were kept of a family gathering, they would show that "Members not Present" and "Subjects Discussed" were one and the same.

It finally happened. I got the GPS lady so confused, she said, "In one-quarter mile, make a legal stop and ask directions.

For the most part, we carnivores do not eat other carnivores. We prefer to eat our vegetarian friends.

On a windswept hill by a billowing sea, my destiny sits and waits for me.

It is not that love is blind. It is that love sees with a painter's eye, finding the essence that renders all else background.

And a moment that ought to have lasted for everHas come and gone before I knew.

Patience is the secret to good food.

When I'm, like, 30, I want to go off the map, have a family and live in Malibu with a farm, and just raise my own chickens.

When I reflect on how things have changed, I can't help but laugh.

It's a perfect day here in Australia, glorious blue sunshine

Write programs to handle text streams, because that is a universal interface.

No matter what, expect the unexpected. And whenever possible BE the unexpected.

I can teach idiots to squat in ten minutes.

Was life always like that? she wondered. A game of hide and seek in which you only occasionally found the person you wanted to be?

I always said that the world is a better place because of Joey Ramone