We sleepwalk through our lives, because how could we live if we were always this awake?

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

I NEVER UNDERSTOOD THE POINT OF BEING SADWHEN I COULD CHOOSE TO BE HAPPY

Solitude sets you free from the rat race of life.

Good leaders make heroes of others.

Never abandon widows, widowers and orphans.

Dad was always that way: who's the candidate that's best for this country? We can debate theology later - that was his famous line. I kind of feel like that's in my DNA.

The truth is lots of films are made, the majority of which are terrible.

Give me an honest con man any day.

We exercise great caution in airing an audio- or videotape released by a terrorist organization holding a hostage. These are decisions made by CNN's editorial staff and not by any third party.

Children are not only sensitive to silence, but also to a voice which calls them ... Out of that silence.

The one hit song that I have tremendous gratitude for is Boots, because it has a life of its own. It's like being identified with a brand name.