We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

You know you're old when someone compliments you on your alligator shoes, and you're barefoot.

The rose has toldIn one simplicityThat never lifeRelinquishes a bloomBut to bestowAn ancient confidence.

Photos’re better than nothing, but things’re better than photos ’cause the things themselves were part of what was there.

Sincerity causes the smallest of good deeds to become the largest.

Doubt is really a groping ignorance.

There is no snooze button on life - Tara Daniels

The goal with a big piece of social legislation is to have a bipartisan result, so the country will accept it

Winning a Grand Slam changes everything. There is so much off-court stuff to deal with. And there are expectations of keeping it going that make it tough

As a successful romantic novelist - one of my publishers is Mills & Boon - I create the sort of male heroes that no woman could fail to adore and few real men could hope to emulate.

The happiest people are those who are contributing to society.

Three English bulldogs count for one kid.