We would all like to vote for the best man but he is never a candidate.

Of all the home remedies, a good wife is best.

Next to a circus there ain't nothing that packs up and tears out faster than the Christmas spirit.

Nobody can be as agreeable as an uninvited guest.

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store.

The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.

Nobody ever forgets where he buried the hatchet.

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest.

The fellow that agrees with everything you say is either a fool or he is getting ready to skin you.

The hardest thing is to take less when you can get more.

It is pretty hard to tell what does bring happiness; poverty and wealth have both failed.

When your mind is overflowing with peace, you will find peace all around you.

You believe the sun will reappear after a stormy day, so why is it so hard to believe, you'll experience happiness after every heartache.

Thank God for all of your short comings because it gives the people who don’t belong in your life something to hang their insecurities on as they drift away in a cloud of delusional perfection.

Life has no meaning. Each of us has meaning and we bring it to life. It is a waste to be asking the question when you are the answer.

A good compromise is one where everybody makes a contribution.

I believe one of the hardest things you can do is conquer your fears, but if you have a goal, then it's your job to open up and let it be real no matter how scary it seems.

I believe that as an entrepreneur, when you share success, it grows.

I think for one thing, kids are a lot smarter now then we ever were.

My faith is whatever makes me feel good about being alive. If your religion doesn't make you feel good to be alive, what the hell is the point of it?

O, let him pass. He hates him That would upon the rack of this tough world Stretch him out longer.