Welcome to Suckersville, man.

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

If there are no new ideas, there is no innovation. And if there is no creativity, there are no new ideas.

The writing is hard, and the drawing is fun. It's very satisfying to see a drawing start to come together.

In the past, I was working out too heavy.

Until you do what you believe in, you don't know whether you believe it or not.

Jerusalem has been our capital for 3,000 years and it's going to be our capital for eternity

Trusting God completely means having faith that he knows what is best for your life. You expect him to keep his promises, help you with problems, and do the impossible when necessary.

Knowledge is potential power. It transforms itself into actual power the moment you decisively act on it.

Success is not success without a successor.

I have been working since I was 11 on everything including period dramas.

A knot you are of damned bloodsuckers.