Well, I'm not saying that America is a bad place or anything. I just think 9/11 needed to happen sooner or later.

I was mad when I heard The Amazing Race wasn't about white people.

I was kosher until I had my Bar Mitzvah, and I parlayed officially becoming a man into telling my father I wanted to eat cheeseburgers.

I once fisted two babies and then used the corpses as boxing gloves to fight off the grieving parents.

It's all about being a part of something in the community, socializing with people who share interests and coming together to help improve the world we live in.

In New York, we tip everyone. We tip doormen, we tip cab drivers, and we tip bartenders at the bar. You'll get quite an evil eye if you don't leave a tip at the bar.

I like hot dogs. I like eggplant. I like pizza and creamed corn and beer. But I don't like Arabs.

The best way to travel abroad is to live with the locals.

I don't mind it if blacks want equal rights, as long as they mean rights equal to a dog

It turns out Superman is weak to Kryptonite and horses.

Women have the right to choose what do with their own bodies. They can take it in the cooch or in the pooper. But that's where their right to choose stops, in my opinion.

... and yet, to say the truth, reason and love keep little company together now-a-days...

A work of art is a corner of creation seen through a temperament.

At the dawn of the 19th century, the country was awakening to its enormous scope and variety.

Our knowledge of shape and form remains, in general, a mixture of visual and of tactile experiences... A child learns about roundness from handling a ball far more than from looking at it.

I know what I like and what I want, and I can sit and enjoy every 10 minutes that go by. And truly enjoy it.

We all miss you so much. It just never ends. It feels like we were all wounded in your battle, Caroline. I miss you. I love you.

My biggest dream is that my words will inspire heart, hope and personal responsibility in people around the globe long after my feet in these shoes aren't walking the planet.

Let us come together and think of ways India does not have to import but we export to the world.

Water is very forgiving. Everything lifts in water

Now, I have nothing against the public school system as it is presently organized, once you allow the humor of its basic assumption about how it is possible to teach things to children.