What is instinct? It is the natural tendency in one when filled with dismay to turn to his wife.

Trust everybody, but cut the cards.

A man's idea in a game of cards is war, cruel, devastating, and pitiless. A lady's idea of it is a combination of larceny, embezzlement and burglary.

A fanatic is a man that does what he thinks the Lord would do if He knew the facts of the case.

The past always looks better than it was; it's only pleasant because it isn't here.

Swearing was invented as a compromise between running away and fighting.

That is, no matther whether th' constitution follows th' flag or not, th' supreme coort follows th' iliction returns.

An appeal is when you ask one court to show its contempt for another court.

Most vegetarians look so much like the food they eat that they can be classified as cannibals.

I niver knew a pollytician to go wrong ontil he's been contaminated by contact with a business man.

Alcohol is necessary for a man so that he can have a good opinion of himself, undisturbed by the facts.

Life is a journey without a known destination.

There is all the difference in the world between treasure and money.

I write every day weekdays for about 5 hours, mostly longhand on legal pads. It has gotten neither harder nor easier, sadly or happily.

George Hamilton is one of the funniest men I have ever known.

Atheist, without God, I look to humankind for sympathy, for love, for hope, for effort, for aid.

If we think about sexual life for a gender life, it seems to me that we have to allow for certain kinds of changes or certain kinds of ways of reconceptualizing ourselves.

Whatever part drink may play in the writer's life, it must play none in his or her work.

I used to go to the supermarket dressed as Peter Pan when I was about five years old.

Nonfiction gives you subjects. Writing fiction I can have more fun, but I have to invent my subject.

Gordon Lightfoot looms pretty large in my life as a writer and an artist in general. I never travel anywhere without at least two of his records with me.