What is magic? There is the wizard's explanation... wizards talk about candles, circles, planets, stars, bananas, chants, runes and the importance of having at least four good meals every day.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

The journey of growth, search for the secret has always been within, the simpler we make it, the better it gets.

When we’ve decided to tell the truth in a story, we should tell good, strong versions of it, proper versions that kids can do something with.

But then peace, peace! I am so mistrustful of it: so much afraid that it means a sort of weakness and giving in.

You were born to be a player. You were meant to be here. This moment is yours.

Family is everything. It is even more important than baseball.

Where it is permissible both to die and not to die, it is an abuse of valour to die.

There is never a rational reason for a man to rejoice that a certain pretty girl exists and that he has found her. The experience, however, is universal.

You give away nice like it doesn't cost you anything.

Beauty is the highest of all these occult influences, the quality of appearances that thru' the sense wakeneth spiritual emotion in the mind of man.

Her life was perfect. But as was often the case, the rest of us were still adjusting.