What obsesses a writer starting out on a lifetime's work is the panic-stricken search for a voice of his own.

There is always time for failure

To escape jury duty in England, wear a bowler hat and carry a copy of the Daily telegraph.

The shelf life of the modern hardback writer is somewhere between the milk and the yoghurt.

No brilliance is needed in the law. Nothing but common sense, and relatively clean finger nails.

All the flower children were as alike as a congress of accountants and about as interesting.

Never believe a rumour until you hear it officially denied.

We don't know much about the human conscience, except that it is soluble in alcohol.

The secret of good health and happiness is to have rather small illnesses throughout your life which you can rely on to stop you doing anything you don't want to do.

Hell must be a place where you are only allowed to read what you agree with.

I suppose that writers should, in a way, feel flattered by the censorship laws. They show a primitive fear and dread at the fearful magic of print.

For some strange reason I get some of my brightest ideas on the toilet seat, with my clothes on.

Forgiveness is not an event. It is a series of decisions made over and over again.

What you do with it and things like that, but I basically chose this after I read it because I thought it was different and funny and unique and dark - things that I like to do.

A leader should never compare his technical skills with his employee's.

We've got to clear some of the room out of the prisons so we can put the bad guys in there, like the pedophiles and the politicians.

Wear down to be renewed.

My wife has always supported me in my career, even when there were times when it was more sensible to get a job. It has been her confidence in me that has helped enormously.

And so long as I can laugh, never will I be poor. This then, is one of nature's greatest gifts and I will waste it no more.

Photographs open doors into the past, but they also alloq a look into the future

But as much as I am personally proud for winning five championships, I'm equally proud just being part of a women's division that has gotten so much better with all these great athletes here.