What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of living high.

Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you'd have preferred to talk.

To err is human; to admit it, superhuman.

Never doubt the courage of the French. They were the ones who discovered that snails are edible.

Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon.

Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.

Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enough to know they were impossible.

If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.

More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.

A true friend is one who overlooks your failures and tolerates your success.

Happiness, it has been observed, is best achieved by those who have been most unhappy heretofore.

My friends, life is so serious that if you are not aware of whom you are, your "youniversity" will be prestigious but unknown!

The Sun after the rain is much beautiful than the Sun before the rain!

I've learned that regardless of your relationship with your parents, you'll miss them when they're gone from your life.

When I read the Bhagavad-Gita and reflect about how God created this universe everything else seems so superfluous

Peace depends upon compromise among peoples who must live together long after our speeches are over, long after our votes have been tallied.

Failure is the foundation of truth. It teaches us what isn't true, and that is a great beginning. To fear failure is to fear the possibility of truth.

People, if you can't get through the puns, I can't give you the good stuff.

The challenge is not to replace Obama but with who. It's not enough to just change up the uniform, if we don't change the team and the game plan, we won't save our country.

We cannot constantly supervise everyone in football ...you cannot ask everyone to behave ethically.