Whatever one does, someone is always happy...then again, someone else is not pleased

If it sounds like writing, I rewrite it.

My name is Stephen Leeds, and I am perfectly sane. My hallucinations, however, are all quite mad.

Our supreme governors, the mob.

My coolest job was when I was 12 and I was a dishwasher at the Three Pigs Bar-B-Que for $2.50 an hour. All the fleabags and stoners worked there, so that’s where I wanted to be.

As with all knowledge, once you knew it, you couldn't imagine how it was that you hadn't known it before.

We in the West must bear in mind that the poor countries are poor primarily because we have exploited them through political or economic colonialism.

Now you can't even carry a nail clipper on a plane. Are they afraid you're going to go..."All right! Give me the plane or the b*tch loses her cuticle." ?

M&A negotiations feel really fun. This is one of the biggest killers of companies, is they entertain acquisition conversations.

All my life I have wanted to skate, and all my life I have skated.

Basically, when I hear the words 'family drama' I run in the opposite direction.