Whatever we worship, short of God, is sure to be our undoing.

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.

It's the most unhappy people who most fear change.

A hypochondriac is one who has a pill for everything except what ails him.

It's innocence when it charms us, ignorance when it doesn't.

The head never rules the heart, but just becomes its partner in crime.

We lavish on animals the love we are afraid to show to people. They might not return it; or worse, they might.

In the arithmetic of love, one plus one equals everything, and two minus one equals nothing.

We choose those we like; with those we love, we have no say in the matter.

They threaten me with lung cancer, and still I smoke and smoke. If they'd only threaten me with hard work, I might stop.

Pity all newlyweds. She cooks something nice for him, and he brings her flowers, and they kiss and think: How easy marriage is.

I take it that the good of mankind means the attainment, by every man, of all the happiness which he can enjoy without diminishing the happiness of his fellow men.

I'm the seagull. No, that's not it. I'm an actress. That's it.

To aspiring writers, I say : Don't give up. Storytelling has been an integral part of the human condition since the beginning of time. Don't let anyone tell you your dreams don't have value. They do.

If't were not for my cat and dog, I think I could not live.

The work part of a relationship is keeping it where you want it.

The chief contribution of Protestantism to human thought is its massive proof that God is a bore.

The signs of outstanding leadership appear primarily among the followers.

Take that bone out of your nose and call me back (to an African American female caller).

Sometimes family was the cruelest form of love there was, for no one could hurt you more than the people who created you.

What God expects us to attempt, He also enables us to achieve.