When I am at rodeo I find it difficult not to root for the animals.

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

A friend is someone with whom you dare to be yourself.

A bad system will beat a good person every time.

Granted there are only seven stories in the universe. And I agree with that. But give me a great variation of those stories. And literate.

One of the most radical things women can do is to love their body.

I think were struggling with trying to redefine various positions at this point in history. To allow freedom for women, freedom for men, freedom from those sharply defined gender roles.

I think the whole under-eye-bag thing is hereditary, and I just got lucky.

I feel like I'm really lucky.

Such are a well regulated militia, composed of the freeholders, citizen and husbandman, who take up arms to preserve their property, as individuals, and their rights as freemen.

An artist’s imagination is his greatest tool

I did not direct any of my investments nor did I know of these investments.