When I asked him how long he had been driving a taxi, he said, Dree mouse.

It's much harder to be a liberal than a conservative. Why? Because it is easier to give someone the finger than a helping hand.

Show me somebody who is always smiling, always cheerful, always optimistic, and I will show you somebody who hasn't the faintest idea what the heck is really going on.

It's been my policy to view the Internet not as an 'information highway,' but as an electronic asylum filled with babbling loonies.

A Pessimist sees the glass as half empty; A Cub Fan wonders when it's gonna spill.

Newspapers, magazines and other publications have the constitutional right to be offensive, even disgusting. As evidence of that, just watch this space regularly.

The subject of criminal rehabilitation was debated recently in City Hall. It's an appropriate place for this kind of discussion because the city has always employed so many ex-cons and future cons.

Contrary to popular belief. It's much wiser to take money from the poor than the rich.

For some people, being free means being free to keep their feet on someone else's chest.

Hating the Yankees is as American as pizza pie, unwed mothers, and cheating on your income tax.

God tipped the country and all the fruits and nuts rolled west.

We were born as a free soul. We only become enslaved in the world.

Don't let anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses ruin your life, be brave and face the day ahead of you

He who lives in the hearts of others never dies! Truly impacting and empowering people where you make a huge difference.

O human beauty, what a dream art thou, that we should cast our life and hopes away on thee!

Love, peace and soul.

That was the justice of Heaven. I trust that you are not dismayed.

if we were forced to choose just one, there would be no way to deny that Judaism is the most important intellectual development in human history.

My kids going to school and teachers denying my kids the grades that they should have once they found out that I was their father.

Climb the mountain so you can see the world, not so the world can see you. Focus all your effort on what is in your power to control.

And he left. I watched him walk out – he didn’t say good-bye, he didn’t even look back. It scared me, how easy it was for him to do that.