When I first started doing sketch comedy, I promised myself that if I were ever to have any success in this business, I wouldn't hold back. Why get there and play it safe?

We all know the moon isn't made out of green cheese...but if it was made out of barbeque spare ribs would you eat it?

Before you marry a person, you should first make them use a computer with slow Internet to see who they really are.

I've always wanted to sail around the world in a handmade boat and I built a boat.

A fashion plate, a rock star in his own mind, Megamind is more showman than deadly menace.

Whenever someone calls me ugly I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

Facebook is like jail, you sit around and waste time, you write on walls and you get poked by people you don't know

I have the physique a lot of people dream about having. It's my obligation to share it with the world.

Alcohol is like Photoshop for real life

I look good. I mean, really good. Hey everyone! Come and see how good I look!

I think my new iPhone 5S is broken. I pressed the home button and I'm still at work

You know how cats do. They hide to die. Dogs come home.

I like strangers, they say the nicest things

Guess you can take the girl off the Earth but you can’t take the Earth out of the girl. Not completely, anyway.

What are they after?” Kat asked. “Hard to say,” Hale said; again, he eyed the room. “Who is that?” Macey asked. “The reason I wasn’t flirting with you,” Hale told her.

I'm blown away by the graphical detail of today's games. I can't imagine that it's going to get any better, but it's just going to continually progress and soon we'll be living in that world.

Hope changes everything. It changes winter into summer, darkness into dawn, descent into ascent, barrenness into creativity, agony into joy.

Daydreaming had started me on the way; but story writing once I was truly in its grip, took me and shook me awake.

It's not like I'm cooking! I'm breastfeeding - I feel like that's the best cooking I could do.

Baseball is the very symbol, the outward and visible expression of the drive and push and rush and struggle of the raging, tearing, booming nineteenth century.

How do you decisions change if retirement is not an option?