When I had my Comedy Central roast, David [Spade] was my first choice to be roastmaster, because I adore him. He's funny as hell, and nobody is meaner.

I wouldn't go back on my old days, though; everybody needs to have their wild years. It's just a question of when and I'd rather have had them early than be doing it as a mid-life crisis type thing.

Can someone explain the vitriol whenever Ayn Rand comes up? 'Atlas' is the greatest motivator for the individual that I can imagine.

Sampling, statisticians have told us, is a much more effective way of getting a good census.

I was sick of playing high-school kids. I liked being a teenager, but I would not go back for all the tea in China.

The '80s were about trying to establish myself as an actor with a career. And being a teenager enjoying the fruits of being successful with lots of what I think is appropriate for that age.

Be funny whenever possible, even if some people don't get it.

We always reminisce about how everyone tried to get Diane Lane's attention, to very little success.

Sobriety was the greatest gift I ever gave myself.

People have a responsibility, especially with today's media, to read between the lines.

Fake confidence on the outside often trumps truthful turmoil on the inside.

Miracles do happen, but, not always the way you expect them

To disdain today is to prove that yesterday has been misunderstood.

Jack Nicklaus is playing an entirely different game, and one which I'm not even familiar with.

We hope everyone will join us in showing everyone just how much fun video games can be.

When you're a monster, you are thanked and praised for not being a monster.

You only get one you, it’s best to just love yourself.

Only when creation stops can we find the Absolute. The Absolute is in the soul, not in creation. So by stopping creation, we come to know the Absolute.

There is a majesty and mystery in nature, take her as you will. The essence of poetry comes breathing to a mind that feels from every province of her empire.