When I hear a guy lost a battle to cancer, that really did bother me, that that's a term. It implies that he failed and that somebody else that defeated cancer is heroic and courageous.

They say that if you're afraid of homosexuals, it means that deep down inside you're actually a homosexual yourself. That worries me because I'm afraid of dogs.

I don't know the difference between a hippie and a hipster but, it's fun to watch either one of them get beat up.

Yeah man, they call gambling a disease, but it's the only disease where you can win a bunch of money.

Note to self: no matter how bad life gets, there's always beer.

I'm thankful for women. I think women are more intelligent than men. Also, without women, there would be no cookies.

You know, with Hitler, the more I learn about that guy, the more I don't care for him.

You ever see 'The Dating Game'? That's a weird game show. The prize on that show: another contestant. Talk about cheap.

The first principle of solid wisdom is discretion, without it all the erudition of life is merely bagatelle.

I always told everybody the perfect joke would be where the setup and punch line were identical.

Violent people usually express their love of a thing by their hatred of its opposite.

By my soul I swear, there is no power in the tongue of man to alter me.

Happiness for me is totally just being at peace knowing that, everything I'm doing, God is pleased with that. It's complete peace for me.

There is no better than adversity. Every defeat, every heartbreak, every loss, contains its own seed, its own lesson on how to improve your performance the next time.

Go toward self-actualization rather than self-image actualization... Search within... for honest self- expression.

That crafty kindness which inveigles me to sacrifice principle is the serpent in the grass - deadly to the incautious wayfarer.

Anybody that's been through a divorce, and I hope it's something people never have to experience, it's the worse thing in the world.

I'm not into bikinis or other revealing clothing.

Washington has thrown their soldiers on the fire.

Run and become. Become and run. Run to succeed in the outer world. Become to proceed in the inner world.

Rather than being an interpreter, the scientist who embraces a new paradigm is like the man wearing inverting lenses.