When I opened my mouth to sing as a kid, I kind of randomly had a really good singing voice. And so that put me on the actor track and the musicals track.

I came back to New York after college like any number of struggling performers, and you just find that niche where you can have some sort of impact. And for me that turned out to be comedy.

I can tell when somebody recognizes me, and I try to avoid those people.

I have a medical condition, all right. It's called caring too much, and it's incurable. Also, I have eczema.

For some reasons, I have WWE wrestlers tweeting me all the time. Like, my biggest fans. Why they can connect with my love for Meryl Streep, I don't know.

If you really think you have something good, you can't take no for an answer. You've got to get in there and ignore the people who say no.

My father and I were really like a team. I mean, he was very supportive. He'd come to every single one of my live shows.

I've had a lot of arguments with people, but it's never really gotten physical.

I'm not a big reality show fan, because I just think it's too fake.

Hotmail just picked up 12 new episodes of 'Judging Amy'.

Difficult People? I don't really know. I don't have those metrics.

Don’t be too busy growing old that you forget to grow up.

I find waiting unbearable because it makes me passive and negates me. I hate being nothing.

If people could walk around in suits of energy, that would be cool. Other than that, I don't think men should wear spandex.

It's nice to have famous people love you.

You think the two of us and a slummy motel make for a dangerous combination?

Content and Riches seldom meet together, Riches take thou, contentment I had rather.

Of the One O'Clock Lab Band after hearing their performance, and sitting in with them at the White House: "I wish it were mine".

From then on, when anything went wrong with a computer, we said it had bugs in it.

Work only a half a day. It makes no difference which half-the first 12 hours or the last 12 hours.

Probably death is the best invention of life.