When all else fails, read the instructions.

Almost anything is easier to get into than to get out of.

Pride was the belt you used to hold your pants up when you had no pants.

We have proclaimed to the world our determination 'to die freemen, rather than to live slaves.' We have appealed to Heaven for the justice of our cause, and in Heaven we have placed our trust.

Whenever I don't get injured, the film is a dud. I didn't bleed on 'Rhinestone.' I didn't bleed on 'Stop! Or My Mom will Shoot.'

I believe that woman are superior to men.

There we measure shadows, and we search among ghostly errors of measurement for landmarks that are scarcely more substantial.

I can no more reread my own books than I can watch old home movies or look at snapshots of myself as a child. I wind up sitting on the floor, paralyzed by grief and nostalgia.

My kids probably started drinking coffee in their late teens.

I decided at 10 I wanted to be in a band; everyone else wanted to play football.

This doctrine of polygamy, or spiritual wife-system, that has been taught and practiced among us, will prove our destruction and overthrow.

We are all Michaelangelos.