[When asked if the voice is an instrument:] Yes, of course. Some are violins, some are fountain pens and some are stethoscopes. And others are just washboards.

To acquire knowledge, one must study; but to acquire wisdom, one must observe.

Success is achieved by developing our strengths, not by eliminating our weaknesses.

Know how and how much to tip people who expect gratuities, even in the case of poor service.

Being defeated is often a temporary condition. Giving up is what makes it permanent.

Working in an office with an array of electronic devices is like trying to get something done at home with half a dozen small children around. The calls for attention are constant.

Be able to hiccup silently, or at least without alerting neighbors to your situation. The first hiccup is an exception.

Be able to analyze statistics, which can be used to support or undercut almost any argument.

Skill is successfully walking a tightrope between the twin towers of New York's World Trade Center. Intelligence is not trying.

Know the official post office abbreviations for all 50 states without having to consult a list.

There's plenty of intelligence in the world, but the courage to do things differently is in short supply.

Who is a rebellious person? The rebellious person is one who does not bother about the society at all. He simply lives through his innermost core

Few of us are granted the grace to know ourselves, and until we do, maybe the best we can do is be consistent.

How can our leaders be so hypersensitive to the most microscopic of perceived anti-Jewish slurs, yet so entirely indifferent to flagrant and vicious anti-Christian insults?

I get to do stand-up every single day. I love that live energy exchange between the audience and myself, and to get to say the things I want to say and comment on.

Winning was everything. I don’t care what they tell you.

Natural religion itself, seems to decay very much. Many will have human souls to be material: others make God himself a corporeal being.

People think I'm smarter than I am.

I don't necessarily wait for that massive leading role. I want to keep the juices flowing.

Things you plan in life usually turn out to be meaningless, things you accumulate without knowing it become your real treasure.

Life isn't just a sequence of waiting for things to be done.